Lady in Red
by 3rdgal
Summary: Very short humor piece. Charlie visits Don at work.


**Disclaimer:** I don't own the characters and I don't make any money off of them.

**A/N:** Thanks to ritt, wiccad, and Em for all the input and feedback!

"What exactly did you say Don was doing?" Charlie asked as David parked the FBI-issued SUV on a street corner.

David glanced to the passenger seat where Colby was fighting to keep a straight face. "He's, uh, working an undercover sting today."

"Yeah," David agreed. "That's it."

"The information I have for him isn't urgent," the younger man said. "It can wait until he's finished with the sting."

"No," Colby said. "I know Don will want to talk to you as soon as possible." David rolled his eyes and swallowed nervously, like he was in the process of making a really bad decision.

"If you say so." Charlie raised an eyebrow and leaned forward in his seat as he peered down the block. All he saw was a handful of rather large, muscular women. "Where is he?"

"Undercover," David flatly replied.

Charlie gave him a puzzled look before studying the women down the street. "Those are some pretty large women," he thought aloud. "All of them right at or over six feet tall. And their musculature is very well-developed." He jerked his head toward Colby as the agent snickered. "What?" he demanded.

"Don's undercover to catch a suspected home invader," David told him. "This guy has struck ten homes in the past two weeks, and the LAPD called us in for assistance."

"So what are we doing here?" Charlie asked curiously.

David nervously glanced at Colby who just grinned and shook his head. "The suspect has a peculiar habit," David continued. "He likes to solicit prostitutes."

"Okay," Charlie nodded. "So do a lot of men. How is that so peculiar?"

Colby laughed out loud and David gave him a withering look. "Well," he hesitated, trying to think of how to phrase the next bit.

"Wait!" Colby cut him off, his voice completely serious now. "There's his car."

Charlie looked up and saw a black sedan pulling up to the side of the curb. The window rolled down and a man's hand appeared, beckoning to the women. A large, blond woman in a tight-fitting red dress and matching high heels approached the car. Charlie studied her closely, trying to make out the features of her face, certain that he must know her from somewhere. It took him a minute to realize that the woman had a prominent Adam's apple. "That's a..." he whispered.

"Move in!" Don's voice called out over the radio. "All teams – move in!"

David and Colby raced from the car as the suspect fled from his vehicle, unknowingly in the direction of their SUV. The blond woman was hot on his heels, running at a very quick pace even in her heels. The suspect saw David and Colby and tried to reverse his path, only to ran smack into the 'prostitute' that he had just tried to solicit. She knocked him flat on his back and held him at gunpoint. As David knelt down and cuffed the suspect, Charlie climbed out of the truck and joined the group.

"Oh no," he heard Don groan, although he still didn't actually see his brother. "What'd you bring Charlie for?"

The young professor realized his brother's voice was coming from the mouth of the 'woman'. His jaw dropped as he finally recognized Don's features hidden under a carefully applied layer of make up. "_Don?_" he asked incredulously.

David bit his lip to hold back a fit of laughter as he took the suspect back to the SUV. Colby didn't even try to resist, despite Don's warning glare.

"What the..." Charlie trailed off.

"Look," Don stared, trying to sound serious despite how ridiculous he knew he must look. "That suspect was bad news. We had to get him off the street, and this is the only way we knew how."

"But couldn't Megan..." Charlie seemed to have lost the ability to finish a thought as his eyes remained glued on his brother.

"No," Don sighed. "He prefers cross dressers."

"Oh." The younger Eppes man continued to stare in shock. "Why not David or Colby?"

"We drew straws and I lost," Don quickly offered.

"Riiight," Colby barely managed around his laughing. "Actually, Charlie, Don was more qualified."

"Colby," Don threatened menacingly.

"What does that mean?" Charlie asked in bewilderment.

"Ask yourself one thing, Charlie," Colby began. When the younger man nodded, he smiled and said, "How is it that Don managed to chase down that suspect so quickly... while wearing high heels?" Colby saw the irritated look in Don's eyes and hurried off to join David with their suspect.

Charlie questioningly raised his eyebrows. "How _did_ you manage that?"

Don sighed as he removed the blond wig, startling Charlie as he could quite clearly recognize his older brother wearing a slinky red dress. "I never should have told those guys about this over drinks last week," Don grumbled. "It's a long story, Charlie. I was joining a fraternity and it was pledge week..."

Charlie grinned. Oh, this was going to be top notch blackmail material, he just knew it.

The End


End file.
